what matters most

almost every 4 am, i waken, and my mind and soul reach for my loving God,... and I pour out my worries, frets, and thankfulness to Him...for my adult children. I pray. I pray hard. I thank. I release...again.

and by 6, the first stirs of the house start up, and the day's calendar rolls around in my head...and I think about if the laundry needs to be moved, or a paper signed, homework checked,...so each of 'em will have all they need for the day...cause that's what we mom's do.

we drink it all in, and we do what we need to do. and on a day to honor mommas, we can't help but reflect, and remember, and reach back to memories. and I bet its the same for each of us...the richest memories are those when things weren't so good...

...when you cuddled the sweaty, feverish little one and worried yourself sick over their "sick". i will never forget literally holding luke for a week while he couldn't keep a meal down for seven days...thanks to the roto virus.

so many of you have faced much bigger and longer and more worrisome sicknesses...and done it with grace... cause mom's do that, and our love'o'meter can go way higher than ever thought...

...of comforting quynh after surgeries that i knew would never completely fix it...and praying harder for her to have the strength to handle it, and even more...that she would lean on her Creator when she wasn't strong enough herself.

...and remembering the moment that I knew that one of my kids would not be "typical". and many years later, remembering the exact moment when i also knew, absolutely knew, that that was "ok", even better than ok. it was perfect.

...when i've looked teens in the eye, and said, "i'm so sorry, i'll do better, please forgive me", cause it takes a long time, if ever, to get the teen parenting thing down right. but you care and you try harder.

...and those afternoons when its 4 o'clock, and you still have an unplanned dinner, two carpools, homework, phone calls, a work out, at least two loads, and need to finish a spat with hubby...which you can't even remember what was about. and so you eat a block of dark chocolate and move on...

...when lovin our three little gals more than earth can measure...but also helping them understand why they are different, feeling deeply with them their losses. and teaching them to embrace those. prayin' that richness in character and joy, and the ability to love, and love some more, --and give back the extra will be the result.

...listening to adult kids, and keeping your mouth shut, knowing they will have to learn it their way, and you can't get in the way. cause God is bigger and better at taking care of them than you are. and they were and are always His, and always will be.

if it weren't for those vivid memories, we wouldn't begin to feel all the good stuff like we should. and for every momma, or aunt, or sister, or daughter, or friend of a child there is so much good stuff to relish. tons.

ok, just a little "bit" more sappy...i promise almost done...

to my hubby, marvin, thanks for being the best dad to each one...and so present in their lives --every single day...

amy, tyler, luke, jacob, landry carter, kylie, kimber and quynh. thank you for replacing my heart with a much bigger one. thank you for teaching me about unconditional love. for helping me not miss the wonder. you give me so much joy and make me so very happy.

to my sweet, generous mom and mil, and moms everywhere...

may your day be relished with cuddles, and laughter, and acceptance, and forgiveness.
and walks and picnics and dinners out. and phone calls that say "i love you" whether those words are spoken or not, and "touching base" with your deployed loved one. with lovin on other's youngun's, cause you might be just what they need that minute.

...and enjoying the garden of blessings and occasional weeds that children of all ages bring.

(and now i can hear in the background of my mind that it is due time to wrap it up..."enuf syrup for the day mom...be so done...and go post some pictures of horses or something":)

happy mothers day.
ps...i put a fave song on the top of my playlist. find a kid and dance today!